Uno: The new TOOL album has the best liner art EVAR. I am serious, EVAR. I've bought worse art books for more than the CD costs. Find it on sale, it's worth it for the art alone. Hell, throw away the CD if you're that tasteless, just look at the booklet!
Deux: It's come to my attention that a good friend has NEVER EATEN A BURRITO IN THEIR ENTIRE LIFE! They find the entire concept of mexican food alien and intimidating. Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is about the same as if you'd never worn cotton before. How the hell do you manage that! I had to drag them, kicking and screaming to an El Pollo Loco so they could have one. I know that's a mediocre burrito, but we must take baby steps. Soon she'll be ready for onions, and then we can start working our way towards guacamole.
Three-o: My tear duct has been acting wierd lately. Well, I guess it's actually been acting normal, but whatever. Usually, I can blow air through it by pinching my nose, but it hasn't been working lately. I got it to work just now, but it was this blast of air and some tear, but not the usual "hey, my eye tickles" steady breeze. Why you care about this, I dunno, but it's important to take care of your tear ducts.
Thanks for talking my drunk self into getting a copy, and thanks for buying it for me. :)
Shut up: I've seen the colour blue, I've had water, and I'm a part of a group! I've also had guacamole, jerk. You can't make me like onions!
After I read the first two sentences of the third paragraph, I though, "aww, he's crying like a normal human being should," but then I kept reading. You're so weird, Travis.